Dear FutureMe,
I broke things off with vlad today. He went to his moms, hes coming for toby tomorrow probably. Im going to sleep at my moms. stephanie came over and hung out for a bit. we drank wine ate pizza, cried laughed farted. He was so special to me. But in the quiet moments when it was just me, I started to feel alone. Used after ***, bothering him when he was on his computer. He denied me kisses bc he just didnt want to kiss me.
I got my peircing today. Nose ring left side bc i sleep on my right.
I have no ******* clue what the future will hold, but I am on my own now. I have to pick myself up by the bootstraps. I provide for me no one else. I will find me not in men but within. I will find my motivation to be the best me, the one I only find in the cabins in Big Bear.
You are my hope. I am holding out for YOU. Look around and tell me it gets better. I really need that right now.
Epilogue
3 days later
Hi kyla, belive it or not, sometimes, i miss YOU!! the whole world has just opened up to you for the first time, theres a crazy sense of...
Ni reemdof hatt. I hknit teh abt mtie all uyo. Uoy tboy sya eby i to hswi mebdrmeere to. Etg a ,utb on swa i rthee ngoig ,ti tol. Os uro nuf ydbrahi!t asw aimgnpc rfo ti tenw i. It teh ta uaiseosq swa. Hteer eesphiatn rsmitchsa rfo ehr egt is itfg a laeyrl epoh gdoo ouy nca i ofrm ltils i s,u. Ldva hksant w me fro lhoitnresiap tnidd atb the fo ikel dngreiinm ruo i ihnsgt. Is sti easy ni teforg a to good tingh onw igtrh w,no epw!h tis hiwhc. Odog neotsmm rremgebeinm ocsrfueo hte i leik. Me ddi atoostbpsr pu ryaell u,yo slreufoy ikcp eht you eltl tle yb. Shti ahdr aght asw. Dya to ryvee owkr dna u sowmohe up otg btu twen. Onw ): sthi omro pgnyia moer i bhtguo daip ehav lslti etstdar teg won! althhe i hot otg in a,nc yengteivrh mi nreaucnsi, ym inagtd bitch i for ym i. Ot llteti sit a elnoa be drah. Ist egts ti reieas l,nlyeo ubt. Uoy go uto nolea. Dniefsr eavh w mroe oephsi ouy eovl to aognn acspee h!o ru ru iggon it !now. Me eremrb efurut iknighnt i of. Etrtel dirngea thsi. Dtdin i be hewre dwolu oknw i. Resmum alreyl gdoo dha i tbu a. I venre tweri neguho slnyheto. I oeph ilke iclkc i chit ottunb fats rmfo ur but, frdrowa for tesfdaiis a. Sdrevee be ot yhapp you. Oevl nad seelf tlisen h,trig u ot t!ug 3< ikdod wtah do oxox ur.
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